Short and Humorous

Humorous short stories & columns

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Author - Geoff M

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Covid Crisis Communication

January 27, 2023
by Geoff M
5 min read

At some stage in the Covid restriction era, people in face to face meetings were all encouraged to sit as far away as possible from one another, like cockroaches scattering when someone turns on the light. This was helpful for...

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  • Health
  • Sport
  • transportation
  • Work

Incidental Exercise

December 5, 2022
by Geoff M
6 min read

“Shorten” said my GP Dr Vigor, “there’s no way around it. You’ll just have to do more exercise”. “But I loathe exercise, I detest it” I said, trying to drive the point home so forcefully that he...

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  • Business
  • Food
  • Hobbies
  • Money and finance
  • Music
  • Relationships
  • Sport
  • Success
  • Work

Mr Cryptic does lunch

November 19, 2022
by Geoff M
5 min read

A Shorten Humorless lunchtime interview with Mr Cryptic, a well known business tycoon famous for his economical use of food, money and words. SH:  Welcome Mr Cryptic. I’d like to ask you a few questions about how you...

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  • Health
  • Money and finance
  • Technology

The death rattle and the dead cat bounce

September 7, 2022
by Geoff M
4 min read

Our gas heater has an important role in winter in keeping us from freezing to death as the temperature plunges toward zero. But it has an undocumented function that’s not in the user manual: the death rattle. Turn it off and it...

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  • Food
  • Health
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  • transportation

Fire in the belly

September 7, 2022
by Geoff M
6 min read

Alfredo, the Formula 1 racecar driver, realised he needed help. He had lost his will to win, his need for speed and his F1 car keys had gone missing. Each morning when he woke up, he didn’t know if he would feel as fiery as...

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  • Entertainment
  • Food
  • Success
  • Words and writing

The wide appeal of banana peel

August 15, 2022
by Geoff M
6 min read

Recently my colleague John “Jokie” Jokeson came over to brainstorm ideas for a short comedy film he is hoping to produce. It went like this: Shorten Humourless (SH): Hi Jokie, what’s new? JJ: Good to see you...

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  • Animals
  • Gardening
  • Household
  • Recreation

Lawn care if you dare

June 1, 2022
by Geoff M
6 min read

A Shorten Humorless interview with Shaun Lorne, the Guerilla Gardener. SH: Welcome Shaun. You’re creating quite a stir in the world of gardening with your new book and podcast “The Guerilla Gardener – Smashing...

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  • Animals
  • Gardening
  • Science
  • Technology
  • Work

A personal history of personal computers

May 27, 2022
by Geoff M
6 min read

“A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kickboxing.” Emo Philips (1990) Admit it. We get close to our computers just like we get close to our dogs. They both have funny little habits like lying down...

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  • Food
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  • Music

The chef and the shirt

May 21, 2022
by Geoff M
2 min read

Recipe – Chemise Blanche et Sweaté Ingredients: 1 ripe white shirt. Ripeness is indicated by a slight yellowing at the top of the garment known as the “collare” area as well as the unmentionable...

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  • Food
  • Health
  • Household
  • transportation

Itty bitty irritations

April 11, 2022
by Geoff M
6 min read

“The average man takes life as a trouble. He is in a chronic state of irritation at the whole performance.…. He fusses about pin-pricks until a mule kicks him. Then he learns the difference”.  Herbert N. Casson...

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